That men make the first move, then plead, cajole, wine, dine and basically
bribe (via chocolates, flowers and dinner dates) women into their bachelor pads
to either a) have their wicked way or b) get down on bended knee. Women --
sweet, passive, delicate little flowers that we are -- start out strong by
defying his attentions, until sheer persistence breaks down our resistance and
we agree to... a sherry. Meanwhile, we fill our days by reading romance novels
and peering from behind closed curtains, on the watch for knights on big white
stallions.
Wrong!
What a load of crap. Women have always made the first move and orchestrated the pace, flow and direction of romantic relationships. Masters of intuition and emotional manipulation, adept at body language, able to gauge the emotional temperature of a room quicker than our nipples stiffen in a breeze, you can bet on it that if he's on his way over, armed with courage and a pickup line, you were the one who lured him.
Deciphering Body Language
Women choose from no less than 52 moves to show men they're interested. The average man chooses from a maximum of 10 to attract a female. Good news then, that the average female is usually very good at deciphering body language. Just in case you're not, I've included the ob
Wrong!
What a load of crap. Women have always made the first move and orchestrated the pace, flow and direction of romantic relationships. Masters of intuition and emotional manipulation, adept at body language, able to gauge the emotional temperature of a room quicker than our nipples stiffen in a breeze, you can bet on it that if he's on his way over, armed with courage and a pickup line, you were the one who lured him.
Deciphering Body Language
Women choose from no less than 52 moves to show men they're interested. The average man chooses from a maximum of 10 to attract a female. Good news then, that the average female is usually very good at deciphering body language. Just in case you're not, I've included the ob
He'll Serve You an Eyebrow Flash
When we first see someone we're attracted to, our eyebrows rise and fall. If
they like us back, they raise their eyebrows. The whole thing lasts about a
fifth of a second and it happens everywhere in the world -- to everyone
regardless of age, race, or class. Lifting our brows pulls the eyes open and
allows more light to reflect off the surface, making them look bright, large and
inviting. A flash might be easy to miss but they're so reliable, if you do spot
one, you may know someone likes you before they've even registered it
themselves. Deliberately extend it for up to one second and you've drastically
upped the chances of him getting the message you're interested.
His Lips Part
If he likes what he sees, his lips will automatically part for a moment when your eyes first lock.
His Nostrils Flare and His Face Generally "Opens"
The raised brows, parted lips, flaring nostrils and wide eyes give the whole
face a friendly "open" expression.
He'll Try to Attract Your Attention
For some men, this might mean a subtle tie adjustment along with a silent
prayer that you'll notice the flash of movement. Others turn into Bippo the
Clown and become so loud and boisterous, they're practically juggling and doing
handstands. Any exaggerated movement or gesture usually means he's trying to
stand out from the group. Another giveaway: He'll unconsciously detach from his
friends by standing slightly apart, hoping to be seen as an
individual.
He'll Stroke His Tie or Smooth a Lapel
We all know what these preening gestures mean. They're the equivalent of the
female lip lick -- "I want to look good for you."
He'll Smooth or Mess Up His Hair
Which gestures he chooses depends on his hairstyle and what's going to make
it look more flattering. Guys do this involuntarily and more often than you
think. Glance back next time you trot off to the restroom and I bet his hands
will be on their way to touching his hair.
His Eyebrows Remain Slightly Raised While You're Talking
A slightly surprised, quizzical expression means he finds you fascinating. Or
completely nuts. Quite frankly, either are preferable to a man who looks at you
with a smooth, relaxed brow and eyes. That one simply finds you boring.
He'll Fiddle With His Socks and Pull Them Up
In the old days, men only dressed up on special occasions, and while the suit
might have survived months in mothballs, the socks invariably continued to get
worn (to death). Hence, why he spent half the night pulling them up, in an
attempt to look the part. It's an extension of preening and it's astonishingly
accurate. If a guy pulls up or adjusts his socks in your presence, it's an
almost 100 percent sign he's interested and trying to look his best.
Everything Is Erect
Ahem. What I mean is he'll stand with all his muscles pulled tight, to show
his body off to best advantage. He'll also stand directly in front of you to
show full attention and lean forward to get closer.
He'll Let You See Him Checking Out Your Body
Some experts call it "visual voyaging" -- his eyes take a little cruise
around your body, stopping momentarily at the prettiest ports. Don't kid
yourself: he scanned your body automatically the second he laid eyes on you. The
difference here is that he's letting you see him do it. The message: I'm
considering you as a sexual partner.
He'll Spread His Legs While Sitting Opposite, to Give You a Crotch Display
He's letting you have a good look at what's on offer. Hopefully, he still has
his jeans or pants on at the time.
He'll Stand With His Hands on His Hips
This accentuates his physical size and suggests body confidence. It's also a
pointing gesture. We point with our hands at our own best sexual assets and also
at the parts of our body where we'd most like to be touched. If he spends the
night with his hands on his hips, fingers splayed and pointing downward, he's
willing you to look, touch and admire the part he's proudest of. All
subconscious, of course. Well, it is in most cases...
He'll Play with the Buttons on His Jacket, Buttoning and Unbuttoning It
It's a displacement activity (fiddling) because you've made him a little
nervous, plus an unconscious desire to remove his clothes. The next stage is to
push the jacket open and hold it there by putting his hands on his hips. If he
takes it off completely, he's imagining his shoes under your bed.
If he's interested, he'll stroke his cheek up and down with the back of his
fingers, touch his ears, or rub his chin. It's a combination of nervous
excitement, preening and autoerotic touching. When we're attracted to someone,
our skin (most noticeably our lips and mouth) become increasingly sensitive to
touch and other stimulation. If you smoke, you'll take more drags on your
cigarette. If you're drinking, you'll take more sips. You start touching your
own mouth more because your lips are ultra sensitive and it feels good. Plus, it
plants the idea in the other person's mind that it could be a good idea to kiss
you.
He'll Start Squeezing His Glass or Roll It From Side to Side, Slightly Squeezing It as He Does So
When men are sexually interested, they start playing with circular objects.
Why? They remind him of your breasts: his body is "leaking" what's happening in
his subconscious mind.
He'll Perch on the Edge of His Seat to Get Closer
And if he crosses his legs, the top leg will point in your
direction.
He'll Guide You By Putting His Arm on Your Elbow or in the Small of Your Back
The arm guide isn't just good manners and a polite way of guiding you through
a crowd; he's making sure he knows exactly where you're going by taking you
there. He doesn't want to lose you! It also shows you're being "taken care of"
so no other men need volunteer. Along with the arm guide, there'll be lots of
accidentally-on-purpose touches.
He'll Lend You His Coat or Sweater
Few guys would be happy to return from the bar to find their girlfriend's
evening dress covered by another guy's jacket. Never mind if her teeth were
chattering from life-threatening hypothermia. He wants it to be his jacket
because it's a protective, sexy, ownership gesture. It says "what's mine is
yours," something that's been close to their skin is now close to yours (and
vice versa when you give it back). It smelled of him to begin with; it'll smell
of you when you return it. Plus, it links you: he has to hang around to get it
back.
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